Sometimes, it’s the little things that just make you laugh.
Sometimes, it’s the little things that just make you laugh.
My sister and I grew up watching the animated ‘Beatrix Potter’ shows. We’d rent them from the Library and begin each morning settled in front of the television, cups of hot tea clutched in our hands, enchanted at the tales of Peter Rabbit and his friends (Mrs. Tiggywinkle, Jeremy Fisher, and the little mice who helped the tailor were my favorites). It was especially nice on rainy, gray days. We happen to be having just one of these days here in Georgia today, and I couldn’t resist posting a song that has remained one of my nostalgic favorites since I was a ‘wee toot’!
Well, my friend Cassie just finished watching the BBC Robin Hood series. We have been commiserating/sympathizing/fangirling for a few days now. This post was inspired by hers, “As far as BBC Robin Hood is concerned…” Since everybody knows how much I love/adore/love/did I mention love? this show, and I had yet to do a real full-out tribute post post on it I thought I ought to. Long live the epicness of this show.
So, enjoy; or laugh your heads off at my silliness. Either one works.
1. Favorite Episode from Each Season: S1 – “Brothers in Arms” (or the last two. Touch choice). S2 – uh… “Treasure of the Nation or Lardner’s ring” (or Get Carter) S3 – “Sins of the Father,” “Too Hot to Handle,” or “The Enemy of My Enemy.” As you can see, I have a bit of trouble making my mind up about these things.
2. Favorite Main Characters, in order: Allan, Will, Djaq, Much, Robin, Tuck, John, Guy.
3. Favorite Quotes:
Much: Don’t tell me to ‘shush’. We’re looking for a tree in the forest!
Allan: I have an idea.
Robin: Go on.
Allan: Well, d’you want clever or really clever?
Robin: I want fast.
Much: I hate the cave.
Robin: We voted, Much.
Allan: And you lost. Five-one.
Much: Yeah, well. I should have two votes, because I really don’t like the cave. In fact, I should have three, because I really, really don’t like the cave.
Much: Bats. I hate bats. Bats are rats. Rats with wings.
Djaq: No, they’re intelligent. Bats make noises you cannot hear.
Allan: What’s the point of that? Noises you can’t hear?
Much: What if there was a noise nobody could hear? And then if you were the only person in the world who could hear it. Because I am that person. To see sense where others see nonsense. Just like the bat. I take it back. I like the bat! The bat is my friend. The bat understands me.
Much: What do I have to do to prove my loyalty to you? What? Tell me! What? I’ll chop off my own arms! Well…one arm because once I chop that off then…I wouldn’t be able to…chop off…the other.
Robin: Trust me! I know the way. Isabella: Oh, of course you do, because you are *so* perfect.
(Kate and Allan are captured and chained up by a tax collector) Allan: I’ve been in worse. If that helps. Kate: It doesn’t. It’s just annoying. Why do you have to show off? Allan: Well this isn’t fun for me either, you know. I mean, I’m stuck here with you, and you aren’t eactly easy on the eyes. Kate: You don’t think I’m pretty? Allan: Eh, just a bit plain for my taste. Kate: Well, I think your neck is too long. Allan: My neck? My nose, maybe! Kate: *laughs* Allan: Feel better yet? Kate: Yeah. Yeah, a little. Allan: Good. But before we go on you might want to move. Think you just sat down on a pig kidney.
- Much: In fact, I can feel a song coming on.
- Robin: No! No song! Absolutely no song!
- Much: It’d be a cheery song.
- Robin: And it would be a tragedy, too! A tragedy for you to have survived the Turk, and made it to within a few miles of Locksley, only to be killed by your own master!
- Much: You know, it is lucky I do not readily take offense! You know, a smaller man would be offended! A smaller man would be wounded!
- Robin: And a cleverer man would sing fewer songs!
- After Robin and his gang had stolen everything from George they go through the forest and immediately they see some villagers that were going to whip some men.
- Robin: Oi! Stop! What are you doing?
- Woman: We’re going to give these a good horse whipping.
- Robin: Why?
- Woman: He stole this. (shows Robin a necklace) My mother gave it to me on my wedding day. It’s the only thing of value I own.
- Tom: You touch us and you’ll be in big trouble. We are Robin Hoods men!
- Robin looks to Much confused.
- Tom: Robin Hood could swing out these trees any second and brush your brains out!
- Much: Oh, surely Robin Hood couldn’t take on all of us.
- Tom: Robin wouldn’t be scared of you. You’re girls compared to him and his men!
- Allan reaches the others.
- Allan: Tom?
- Tom: Allan.
- Much: Do you know him?
- Allan: He is my brother.
- Allan hits Tom into the face and grabs his jacket.
- Allan: My purse, my sword, my horse.
- Tom: I can explain. My nose! What kind of thing is that to do to a brother? Is it broken?
- Allan: I say, whip him within an inch of his life!
- Tom: If you touch me again Robin will string you up on the tallest oak in the Sherwood Forest!
- Allan: This is Robin Hood, you idiot! *socks Tom in the face*
- Tom: Ow! Did you see what he did? What kind of a thing is that to do to a brother? *turns to companions* Is it broken?
- Allan: My sword? My purse? My horse!?
- Tom: The thing is, I woke up and we’d both been robbed! And rather than wake you, I went off to catch the thieves myself. I chased them for days!
- Allan: He couldn’t tell the truth if his life depended on it.
- Much: Runs in the family then?
- Allan: Don’t make us gang up on you.
- Tom: Is he disrespecting our family?
- Much: You rob each other in your family!
- Sheriff: [after pouring acid on Gisborne’s arm] Stop mewling, Gisborne! Maybe in future, you’ll think twice before painting your arm like a girl!
- Much: Prince John, in the absense of good King Richard, has turned this country into a state of terror! His followers are thugs! Our taxes are too high! People are starving! What does one have to do to get arrested around here? (attacks guard) Arrest me!
- Guards: [Drag Much away.]
- Much: Thank you!
- Robin: Maybe that’s the real magic. Listening.
[Robin walkes away while whistling.]
- Much: Why don’t you listen to me more then, master? Master!
- Robin: What? Sorry. Sorry, did you say something?
- Much: Unbelivable! You talked me about listening and you don’t listen.
- Much: You talked to me about listening! [Robin starts laughing.] Much: Very funny!
Little John: [About his son, to the Gang] Him, I am proud to know. You, I’m stuck with.
- Matilda: A bee failed to kill him, and quack failed to kill him! I’ll behanged if a boy I delivered into this world sneaks in and finishes off one of my patients!
- Robin: Matilda, I can’t let him live to speak his treason.
- Matilda: [Sighs] So it’s not his life your afraid, then? It’s his tongue.
- Robin: So…should we just cut out his tongue?
- Matilda: [Smacks Robin on the head.] Men! Always thinking in a straight line!
- Sheriff: You wanted a word. What was the word?
- Winchester: Sussex.
- Sheriff: Sussex?
- Winchester: Sussex.
- Sheriff: Sussex. Hmm…
- Winchester: I want it.
- Sheriff: Sussex?!
- Sheriff: By the way, Marian sends a message.
- Guy of Gisborne: What message?
- Sheriff: “I’m not coming back, get over it… and for goodness’ sake, change your clothes once in a while.”
- Guy of Gisborne: Very funny.Robin: Where’s Will and Djaq?Much: They said they’ve gone to get some honey….But why does it need two of them, hmm? Honey is one of those things.Robin: What things?Much: What do you call it when you use a sweet innocent word but what you really mean is something else?Little John: A lie?Much: No.Marian: A euphemism?Much: A euphemism. Exactly. There’s a bit too much honey going on around here if you ask me. Will and Djaq nipping off together…you two going for long walks in the forest.Little John: (whispers) He’s jealous.Much: What happened to fighting for justice and rebelling against the Sheriff? We should be sticking together. Instead, we’re splitting into couples. And to be perfectly honest (puts his arm around Little John) I don’t fancy mine much! Anyway, while you two’ve been off gallivanting, we’ve had to…Robin: We haven’t been gallivanting!Much: I know what you’ve been up to!Marian: We were burying a corpse in the forest.Much: (pause) Is that a euphemism?Now I have a lot more favorite quotes – it has GOT to be the most quotable show ever created – but those are my tippy-top favorites.
4. Favorite costumes: Marian’s Night Watchman outfit –
Allan’s third season outfit –
and Kate’s second outfit.
5. Favorite Weapons: Allan’s 2 swords in Season 3, Marian’s hair daggers, and Will’s hatchet/axe.
6. Biggest “Yeah Right” moment: Robin’s ‘magical airplane’ shot in Season 3, Episode 4.
7. Favorite Extras: Carter (“Get Carter”) and the Fool (“Lardner’s Ring”)
8. Favorite Scenes: This scene – http://tinypic.com/r/6nt9xw/7
and the scene where the Fool ‘steals’ Allan’s keys…
and the ‘brothers in arms’ handshake between Will and Allan…
and the scene in Season 3 where Rufus kidnaps Allan and Kate, and the scene in “The Enemy of My Enemy” where Little John is captured and Allan takes out 5 guys. With a stick. (And NO, I’m not showing favoritism! Seriously! None!)
9. Least Favorite Scene: When Will tells Djaq he loves her. It could have been SO good – but the writers went and gave him some pretty corny lines there. HERS were good, why couldn’t they have given HIM good ones, too?? and of course, Allan’s death. and Marian’s death. and Gisbourne’s death. There are a lot of deaths.
1. You find a baby in the woods. You –
a. Give it to someone else – don’t want to hurt it!
b. Find the mother
c. Care for it until it can be sent to an orphanage
d. Try desperately to make it shut up
e. Drop it
f. Take to a convent
g. Get annoyed because now you have to keep an eye on it
2. Your favorite quote is –
a. It’s a good day to die
b. Men are so predictable
c. I’m good with wood
d. I’m not being funny
f. Rest in peace, my son.
g. I can handle it!
3. Would you rather be…
a. A farmer
b. A pigeon-handler
c. A carpenter
d. A thief
e. A sidekick
f. A monk
g. A simple villager, thanks
4. You have an important job to do. To get it done, you…
a. Do it. Duh.
b. Get some help, then do it.
c. Analyze the quickest possible solution
d. Con it off onto somebody else
e. Try it, but mess it up.
f. Get everyone to pitch in and finish it in half the time
g. Say “Why can’t someone else do it?”
5. You are offered a job by your enemy. You say…
b. Are you crazy?
c. Over my dead bodyd.
d. What’s in it for me?
e. Um… well… I don’t know…
f. Pray for the person
g. Laugh in their face
6. Someone is badly wounded. You…
a. Rush them to the nearest doctor
b. Try to fix them yourself
c. Hurry to find someone who can help
d. Stay by them even if you have no idea what to do
e. Flutter frantically, undecided
f. Administer medicine and try to make them as comfortable as possible
g. Scream for help
7. You’re trapped in a seemingly impossible situation. You…
a. Try to break your way out with brute force even though you know it won’t work
b. Get everyone talking to pass the time
c. Try to work your way out with smarts
d. Resign yourself for the time being
e. Collapse into weeping and/or panic
f. Do not lose your calm, knowing you are safe for eternity
g. Shout and kick things in frustration
8. You and your friend have a crush on the same person. You…
a. Don’t really HAVE crushes…
b. Fight for them
c. Say nothing about it
d. Give your friend advice on how to win their crush over
e. Hope you’re never in this situation
f. You really don’t have crushes, either.
g. Are you kidding? You’re the person they have a crush ON!
9. Your favorite fighting style is…
a. Brute force
b. Small but effective
c. Fast and intense
d. Strong and dirty
g. Wild and angry
10. Robin needs a way to get into the castle. You say…
a. Let’s go now!
b. I know someone who can help!
c. Give me one second, I’ll figure something out
d. Do you want clever or really clever?
e. I don’t know what to do!
f. Is this wise?
g. Can I come?
If you answered…
Mostly A’s – you’re Little John! You’re strong and make decisions based on immediate emotions.
Mostly B’s – you’re Djaq! Small but feisty, you have a sweet and caring nature.
Mostly C’s – you’re Will Scarlett! Quiet and thoughtful, you don’t talk much – but when you do, people listen.
Mostly D’s – you’re Allan a’Dale! Sarcastic, fun-loving, and ocassionally thick-headed, you like a good time.
(Cassie – THIS is ‘the look.’ Oh yeah.)
Mostly E’s – you’re Much! You’re a worrier by nature, but only because you love people so much.
Mostly F’s – you’re Tuck! You give good advice and think things through before acting.
Mostly G’s – you’re Kate! You’re fiesty and often come across rude even though you don’t mean to.
You’ve watched each season at least three times all the way through.
You wear the hood on your hoodie up for a reason.
You spend at least five minutes of every day sighing over or thinking about your favorite RH couples. (Robin and Marian FOREVER!)
You and a partner say, “Are we going to kill them? Yeah! Are we going to like it? Yeah!”
You can’t eat a shish kebob without thinking of the ‘Much Touch’.
At any given moment you can run off at least five quotes.
Rose petals have an entirely different meaning to you.
If someone tells you that they had no choice, you say, “Everything is a choice; everything we do.”
– You have a playlist of songs that remind you of RH.
You plan to take a trip to Sherwood Forest andNottingham.
The only thing that can tear you away from an episode is a death to someone very close.
You watch fan-made music videos on YouTube constantly.
The forest, or any large gathering of trees, feels like home.
You dress in medieval clothes and go into town, your cloak flowing behind you.
You disagree with people like this, “A clue: no.”
You’ve decided to name your first child after one of the characters in RH.
You’ve seen people who remind you of characters from the show and won’t stop staring.
You want to jump through the screen at Kate and squeeze her neck, saying, “He’s got a wife up in heaven waiting for him! Back off!” (Besides, she belongs with Allan!)
You’d also like jump through the screen and smack Robin upside the head and remind him about Marian.
It’s an everyday thing for you to say, “La-di-da-di-da” or “Blah-di-blah-di-blah.”
You’ve read every book on English legends, Robin himself, The Third Crusade, and medievalEngland.
You own your own dog tag that you wear all the time.
You randomly shout “We are Robin Hood!” And then smile and wave those who look at you and wonder why.
You see squirrels and think of chickens and see chickens and think of squirrels.
You don’t tell somebody to ‘go away.’ You tell them to ‘Jigger Off!’
If someone tries to swipe any sort of food you tell them it’s not properly cooked.
You celebrate Robin’s birthday. Without the mercenaries!
While some say that they’re Team Edward or Team Jacob in reference to Bella, you’re Team Robin or Team Guy in reference to Marian.
You sometimes speak in a British Accent. (Preferably Cockney)
If you have to go somewhere different you’ll say, “Time to disappear,” or when you’re with other people, “Come on, gang, this way!”
You own a bow and arrows or take archery lessons.
You nit-pick at historical details in the show.
You write fan-fiction for the show nonstop, even if you don’t post some of it.
You call anyone who’s acting snooty Lavender Boy/Girl.
You start quoting signature character lines (or ANY lines, for that matter)
You begin to pick up habits from the show (i.e. Guy rubbing his nose, Allan’s facial expressions)
You genuinely want to hurt/ main one or more of the characters (*coughIsabellacough*)
Whilst watching RH you start screaming at the TV in the genuine belief that the characters can hear you and will respond to your shouts
You have/are planning to re-watch all the episodes a dozen times or more.
The word ‘Hood’ makes you jump
Your friends know not to call you when you are watching RH, for fear of you killing them
You have dreamt that you are in the cast of RH
When you see somebody doing something silly you walk up to them, arms spread wide, and go “What were you doin’?” in a Cockney accent.
The principal reason you look forwards to the weekend is RH
You hum the theme song at random intervals
The historical inaccuracies of the program (Bible in English 300 years early, a non-Saracen Saracen bow…) occasionally make you red with rage… but you really don’t care because the show is awesome anyway.
You scour YouTube watching all the fanvideos and either crying or laughing.
You are dead jealous of Lucy Griffiths (or ANY girl in the series, for that matter)
Any conversation you have can be linked back to RH
You find your self staring at any boy with the last name Armitage or Armstrong in the hope that he may be the actor’s long lost nephew
You can quote sections of episodes…
… You can quote entire episodes!
You’ve started to wonder why people don’t love you
You’re able to like your friend’s behavior with that of RH characters (ie. A friend says they’re hungry and you think ‘that is so like Much’ – extra points if you say it out loud)
You have cried at any episode (end of series two,Roy’s death, when Djaq and Will confessed how they felt… *guilty*)
You cried when watching said episode for a second time
Anything that is black leather makes you think of Gisbourne
You know where Gisbourne is
You know where Huntingdon is
You have seen every Robin Hood film in existence just in case it provides you with extra information on RH himself or what the writers may do next
You have seen every Robin Hood film in existence just so you can point out how much better the TV show is
You’ve already planed to write a strongly worded letter to the BBC if BH series four is not commissioned
Your idea of a dream night in is; a large duvet, ice-cream and as many RH re-runs you can fit into one night
You start replaying clips of the show in your head when you’re really bored. Or even if you’re busy.
40. When you are writing the word “robin” (as in the bird), you accidentally capitalize the “R”
You have a RH screen saver/ desktop image on your computer
. You squeal with delight and/or horror at intervals during the episodes
You are banned form watching episodes with your family because of said squeals
Your insults can be linked to RH (“You sounded just like Isabella”)
You’re writing a book and want to call the tavern the “Trip Inn”
You apply toNottinghamUniversity Because Of Robin Hood
You own a “Gisbourne glare”
You convince your parents to get you a re-curve bow for Christmas
You get your friends obsessed with RH before they even see it
When anyone says the word ‘much’ you automatically think of RH.
You BLAME THE WRITERS for everything. It’s not the characters, or the show, it’s THEM – Historical inaccuracy: the writers fault, Djaq and Will don’t come back from the holy land: the writers fault! Guy… kills… m m marian *sniff*: THE WRITERS FAULT!
You wear your sweatshirt with the hood up for a reason
A humorous short story
“Somehow, I don’t get the feeling that this was a smart idea.”
“Oh, sure it was!”
“No, really, I don’t think so.”
“The bees, for one thing!”
“Will, who cares about bees? Just pretend they ain’t there.” Allan stood at the bottom of the tree, squinting up at Will, who was perched on the seventh or eighth branch up.
“How can I, when they sting? I’m coming down.” Will began to descend, much to Allan’s dismay.
“Hey! We can’t just leave a perfectly good beehive up there, now, can we?”
“Nope.” Will landed in front of the other man. “You go get it.”
Allan looked incredulous. “Me?”
Will nodded. “You.”
Will glanced around, pretending to be looking in vain for another person. “Well, because you’re the only other one here. And I refuse.”
Allan glared and crossed his arms. “On one condition.”
Will leaned his back against the tree. “What?”
“I get the first bite.” Allan grinned. “Now boost me up.”
Will obligingly helped Allan reach the lowest branch which had to be at least seven feet off the ground. Once there, Allan gave him an ‘okay’ sign and began to climb. The two had discovered the beehive on their way back from Nettlestone, where they had had the chore of handing out money to the needy. “Toss me up a stick,” Allan called down. Will obligingly bent over and hefted up a good-sized stick. Aiming carefully, he threw it up at Allan, accidentally clubbing him on the side of the head.
Looking slightly dazed, Allan caught it before it fell and waved it a little. “Thanks,” he said, with more than a touch of sarcasm.
Will winced, but grinned. “How are the bees?” he called.
There was a resounding ‘smack,’ then “Angry!” from Allan.
“Don’t get stung!”
“Well, I wouldn’t exactly do that on purpose, would I?” Allan sounded half-teasing, half-annoyed. “Look out!”
The beehive fell through the air and Will instinctively caught it before it shattered. “Hurry up!” he called, beginning to run. “I’m heading towards the stream!”
“I’ll catch up with you” Allan shouted, climbing quickly down from the tree and racing off after Will. It took five minutes of breathless racing before they plunged into the cool waters of the stream.
“Whew,” said Allan, as the bees hovered at the bank.
“I don’t think they’re leaving,” said Will, eying the horde.
Allan gave him a disbelieving grin. “’Course they are. Bees hate water.”
“I know,” said Will, “but they’re still there.”
Allan frowned. “I don’t like smart bees. We can swim for a while.” Being careful not to wet the honey, they pair swam downstream and climbed out. The bees were gone.
“That was easy,” grinned Allan, and received a dark look from sopping wet Will. They reached the camp an hour later, still damp but with a beehive full of honey to show for it.
“What happened to you?” exclaimed Djaq, who was the first to sight the two young men.
“Bees,” moaned Allan, falling into bed.
Will put the beehive down and copied Allan, sinking into his own bed. “Honey.”
“Bees and honey.” Djaq pried open the top of the beehive. “How did you ever manage this!?”
“It wa’n’t easy, that’s for sure,” said Allan, his voice slurred by tiredness. “G’night.”
Djaq shook her head, smiling. That night they ate honey-roasted venison, courtesy of Much and the two brave, daring hive-snatchers, Allan and Will.
Enjoy! We are Robin Hood!