Well, this is a year of progress, I think. Mom pointed out yesterday something which stunned me – I have only one more year of school left. To which I thought “Wow, I need to quit being lazy and actually apply myself.” Kind of a shocker, I know. I don’t really TRY to be lazy… but it’s very easy not to give everything your best. (The only thing I work and work and work on and don’t seem to get anywhere with is algebra, but that’s another story. Heavens, I have to finish that AND Geometry in one year!)
But Jesus demanded our best – He doesn’t particularly favor half-lived lives. If you’re going to do something, then DO it – don’t slack about it, don’t complain about it, don’t gripe, whine, fret, procrastinate, or dither about it. Just DO it – I find that when I follow this rule, things get done much faster. It’s amazing how much of our life is taken up by complaining. I feel ashamed of myself when I catch myself saying things like “The remote is broken!? You mean I have to stand UP to change the volume!?” or “The computer is being so SLOW today! It’s ridiculous!” …and then I think of people like those in Japan, who have lost lost everything they own. Or people in Africa who don’t have these things in the first place. People who don’t even have clean water to drink or clothes to wear.
I ordinarily don’t think of myself as a selfish person, but I am. I’m extremely selfish – and it’s hard not to be in America. We have so much that we take it for granted, without bothering to stop and think about all the blessings we really have.
This is one of my projects for this year – wipe all complaining off the face of my character. I know it won’t be “Poof – gone!” but I’ve tried it before, and you know what I realized? The only things I have to complain about are STUPID!
Another thing I am going to work on this year is Distraction. I am distracted much too easily – it’s so easy to be in the middle of a project and think “Hmmm… I wonder if so-and-so has replied to that email I sent,” or “I’ll just wander upstairs for a few minutes and see if I can find a snack.” And of course, then the project takes FORRREEVVERRR to accomplish.
I am hoping to have my book, “The Shadows Fall,” completely rewritten by the end of May. Then begins the editing process. I am going to give myself a set time – probably early in the morning again – in which to write. A publisher wants my book, and so I’m going to put my shoulder to the wheel and give it my best. (Mind you, my head will stay in the clouds, but I’ll try and keep my feet on the ground). I want to buy one of those Word Processors that doesn’t allow online for me to write on – it’s much less distracting when you don’t keep popping up facebook or email or cool pictures. Also art – I’m working on furthering my artistic talents. Illustrating for Aletheia magazine has really helped, as has working on the illustrations for the Book of Sylvari. I’m also open for commissions, which are extremely fun (as well as my only current way of earning money!)
Another thing I’m working on is Serving. I’m not very good at that. Somebody asks for something, I say “You have two legs, get it yourself!” It’s HARD to serve people, isn’t it? I’m taking it in steps, though. I’m reading an excellent set of books by Shannon Primicerio, which I call the “Girl Who” books. I’m reading “Being a Girl Who Loves” at the moment, and it has really helped with my attitude over the last month. After that, then comes “Being a Girl Who Serves,” and then lastly “Being a Girl Who Leads.” (Her other book, “God Called a Girl,” is also fantastic and highly recommended).
So I’m going to push ahead and dedicate myself this year – I’m almost seventeen, and it’s time to stop acting like I’m thirteen. It’s an interesting thought – not scary, just interesting.
And I think I’m looking forward to it.